In 2007 I went to a daylong “Empathy Intensive” Miki Kashtan was leading at BayNVC’s Oakland office.  During the workshop she addressed the use of the phrases like “giving empathy” & “receiving empathy”.  What I took away from her comments was that this way of describing the process lends itself to misunderstandings about how empathic connection can come about… ie “I need empathy from someone” implies dependence on another when in fact your needs are there, beneath your thinking, ready to receive you.

She shared her preference to instead think of ‘entering an empathic space’ with another person.  This helped me make sense of what I’d heard from Marshall Rosenberg, that empathy is not what you say (and not even what you feel), it’s where you put your attention!  This bring me to the name I’m using for this blog, “Empathic Space” – she uses this term in the video below, roughly two and a half minutes in.  The clip is part of the Empathy Documentary Project.

Miki will be in Santa Cruz Saturday, March 6th for a day exploring Power, Resources and Choice.  Kristin Masters comments:

not to miss- Miki has a clarity, insight and handle on issues of power and choice that I find revolutionary in my personal and political lives. we need to know if you are coming, or we might cancel, so call 440-8979 NOW, and pass on to others who want to understand using compassionate communication to create the world as we want to live it!